St Patricks Day Quote or Funny

Here are Will and Guy's collection of St Patrick Day Quotes Irish blessings, poems and toasts
for 17th March.

Every Saint Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman
to make a speech to. Anon

• Drôle Irish Quotes
  for St Patrick's Day
• Irish Drinking Toast
• Funny Quotes
  Suitable For Saint Patrick's Day
• Jokes for St Patrick's Day

Contents

• • • 0.0.0.1
• 1 Drôle Irish Quotes forSt Patrick's Day
• 2 Will and Guy's Selection of Quotes By Irish Men and Women
• 3 Irish Drinking Toast
• 4 Alternative Irish Toast:
• 5 More Amusing Irish Toasts
• 6 Irish Blessings - For the Home:
• 7 More Funny Quotes Suitable For Saint Patrick's Day
• 8 An Irish Friendship Wish
• 9 How ToIdentify A Real Irishman
• 10 Strange St Patrick's Day Custom
• 11 See more funny Irish jokes and clean Irish stories :

Drôle Irish Quotes for
St Patrick's Day

• In Ireland the inevitable never happens and the unexpected
  constantly occurs. John Pentland Mahaffy
• Work is the curse of the drinking classes.  Oscar Wilde
• A man travels the world in search of what he needs and returns home
  to find it.  George Moore
• Alcohol is a very necessary article.  It enables Parliament to do
  things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the
  morning. George Bernard Shaw
• These things I warmly wish for you: Someone to love, some work to
  do, A bit o' sun, a bit o' cheer, And a guardian angel always near.  Irish
  Blessing

Will and Guy's Selection of Quotes By Irish Men and Women

If Will and Guy have a specialty, then it's seeking variety, and that
what you will find in these our ten favourite, clean and funny Irish
Quotations for St Patrick's Day.

1. Every action of our lives touches on some chord that will vibrate in
   eternity. Sean O'Casey
2. I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted.
   Soccer superstar George Best
3. If you could drink dreams like the Irish streams
   Then the world
   would be high as the mountain of Mourne
   In the Pool they told us the
   story
   How the English divided the land... John Lennon, "The
   Luck of the Irish" (song)
4. I only drink on two occasions - When I am thirsty and when I'm not
   thirsty.  Brendan Behan
5. Ireland is a peculiar society in the sense that it was a nineteenth
   century society up to about 1970 and then it almost bypassed the
   twentieth century. John McGahern
6. I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt.
   Edna O'Brien
7. A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.
   Jonathan Swift
8. The Irish are a very fair people, they never speak well of one
   another. James Boswell
9. The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots
   haven't seen the joke yet. Oliver Herford
10. A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. Irish Proverb

Irish Drinking Toast

May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven
Half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Alternative Irish Toast:

Here's
to our wives and girlfriends:
May they never meet!

More Amusing Irish Toasts

• May the dust of your carriage wheels blind the eyes of your foes.
• May you live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live.
• May your fire never go out.
• May your well never run dry.
• Sláinte: Irish Gaelic and pronounced 'slawn-cha' means health, much
  the same as 'cheers'.
• May we be alive at this time next year.
• May the roof above you never fall in and those gathered beneath it
  never fall out.
• A bird with one wing can't fly - said to encourage someone to take a
  second drink.
• May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty.

Irish Blessings - For the Home:

Walls for the wind,
And a roof for the rain,
And drinks beside the fire -
Laughter to cheer you
And those you love near you,
And all that your heart may desire!

More Funny Quotes Suitable For Saint Patrick's Day

• Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
  Spike Milligan
• If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how
  to listen, society here would be quite civilized.  Oscar Wilde
• He who can does. He who cannot, teaches. George Bernard Shaw
• I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing I ever do with
  it.  It is never of any use to oneself. Oscar Wilde

An Irish Friendship Wish

• May your purse always hold a coin or two.
• May the sun always shine on your windowpane.
• May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
• May the hand of a friend always be near you.
• May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

How To
Identify A Real Irishman

• A true Irishman considers a bore to be someone who keeps constantly
  interrupting.
• A true Irishman considers anyone who won't come around to his point
  of view to be hopelessly stubborn.
• A true Irishman has so much respect for the truth that he uses it
  only in emergencies.
• See more Saint Patrick Day jokes.

Strange St Patrick's Day Custom

'I had an accident opening a can of alphabeti spaghetti this
morning,' said Murphy.

'Were you injured?' inquired Seamus.
'No, but it could have spelled disaster,' concluded Murphy.

Footnote:
Please send us your funny St
Patrick's Day quotes.

See more funny Irish jokes and clean Irish stories :

•
Funny Irish jokes   •
Clean Irish jokes   •
Good Irish jokes   •
Best Irish jokes   •
Classic Irish jokes

•
Funny Irish stories   •
Irish drinking stories   •
Short Irish stories
• Irish driving   •
Irish sausages

•
Funny notices Dublin bus   •
Funny Irish phrases   •
Leprechaun pictures   •
Funniest Irish jokes

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Source: https://www.funny-jokes.com/funny-st-patrick-day-quotes

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